Before the story of Seamus’ birth can be told and fully understood, the story of Declan’s birth must be retold. Here are the blog posts of my Birth story from May 2012:
Please be aware that Declan’s birth was traumatic and may be a trigger if you have had a similar situation, are squeamish, or a worrier and pregnant.
Dr. Rose (the resident on call at the time) broke my bag of Waters (which had sprung a leak about 3 hours before) to help move things along, since they were worried about preeclampsia and really wanted to get the baby out. It wasn’t something we really wanted to do, but more than that, we didn’t want a cesarean-section and it was starting to look like we were on that track. So, Dr. Rose used a crochet hook looking thing to break the bag of waters and after the gush, contractions picked up 100% and got crazy, crazy painful!
I gave in to some painkillers to help relax me between contractions because I was tensing up HUGE amounts in between and making things worse. The way one of my mom & baby nurses put the use of the painkiller was the best description: ”It’s like drinking a margarita for the pain – you feel nice and relaxed between contractions, but when the contraction hits, you’re pissed because it still hurts like you had no drugs.”
After they breaking the waters, things began moving INSANELY fast. I went from 5cm to 10cm dilated in an hour and a half. when I hit 9cm my body started telling me to push. the doctor checked, said “9 cm. you can push in 20 minutes, but no pushing until then!”
Those 20 minutes were the hardest of my life. Hubby and my mom spent it talking (and holding!) me down from pushing. ”Breathe, breathe, breathe. Don’t push. you can do this. Don’t push. Breathe! Relax!”
Finally, they let me push. For the first 45 minutes it was the best feeling ever. I felt strong, in control, and it was a release from the labor that had been plaguing my life for the past 4 weeks. After that, I just started to feel tired. I couldn’t help but push when the urge hit, but the Doctor wanted 3 pushes with each contraction and the 2nd and 3rd just felt exhausting every time. At first I was pushing from my back with hubby and the nurse holding my legs and me pulling back on my thighs. Then I flipped over on to hands and knees on the bed. It was at this point that I lost any need or desire for modesty. I tore of the hospital gown, moaning something about “I can’t wear this anymore. get it off, get it all off.” I really wanted to get rid of the monitors too, but they wouldn’t let me because they wanted to keep an eye on the baby’s heart rate. I pushed for an hour and a half – starting on my back, middle on my knees, flipping back to my back to deliver. In the last pushes, as he crowned, they pulled up a mirror so I could see his head. It was so amazing and it hurt SO much. During 2 of the pushes, I felt myself tear and I screamed like a banshee – my voice was shot for days – not great for a singer! Finally his head came out and they unwrapped the umbilical cord and I pushed the rest of him out. They put him on my chest and we waited for the cord to stop pulsing so the hubby could cut it. There were tears pouring down both of our faces as we looked at our little boy for the first time. I kept saying “I did it. He’s so beautiful.” over and over again.
The nurses took Declan across the room to weigh, measure, and clean him up a bit while they started stitching me up and worked to deliver the placenta.
The scary and unusual conclusion to follow. Please do not read if you are pregnant, a worrier, or at all squeamish.
|content after eating|
As we watched our son get measured, weighed and cleaned up some, Dr. Rose was dealing with something a lot more serious and scary. I had a tear up the front near the left labia that she was fixing up while trying to encourage the placenta to deliver. Once she delivered the placenta, she realized that there was a lot of bleeding coming from somewhere. She started trying to find and repair it with just local anesthetics, but couldn’t. Dr. Rose then sent one of the nurses to get Dr. McKay, the head OB/GYN on call. It was about this time that we noticed that something wasn’t right with me
Dr. McKay came in and the two of them were looking and stretching my vagina, looking for the bleed. It was quickly decided that emergency surgery was necessary. As they wheeled me out of the room, hubby looks at me while holding our little boy and said “we WILL see you in a little while. We love you.”
I was so tired that nothing had penetrated until then. As they were wheeling me down the hall, they were explaining the risks of the spinal block that I was about to get and trying to get permission to administer it. I remember saying “can you fix it? Then just do what you need to to fix me.”
I hardly remember anything from the O.R. I remember arriving and helping maneuver myself to the table, I vaguely remember being mostly asleep and leaning on someone while they administered the spinal block. Other than that, I remember almost nothing. They didn’t actually knock me out, but I was so tired from laboring all night (and for nights previous) and pushing the baby out that I slept through most of the surgery. I woke up about an hour and 15 minutes later and chatted with the anesthesiologist (who was 33 weeks pregnant) while they finished up.
|my dad in the PACU, holding Declan for the first time|
They wheeled me into the recovery area of the OR wing to wait for the first blood transfusion and my family to come down. They couldn’t bring Ethan and the baby down fast enough for me. I couldn’t get that boy in my arms fast enough, though my arms were too tired to hold him for long.
After waiting 3 hours for the blood to arrive (I’m O negative, so I can only get O neg blood and there was apparently none on the shelf – i found out later from a friend of mine who works in the lab there.
The important thing (for any of you who ignored the disclaimer) to know is that this is an extremely rare occurrence. The Doctor who admitted us to the hospital on the 28th ran into my husband in the hallway during the week and said; (essentially, not exact quote)
“I heard that happened with your birth. This NEVER happens. So strange.”
This particular doctor finished his ob/gyn residency in 1987… so he’s been practicing for over 25 years…
There is a reason that this isn’t even on your radar if you’re pregnant. It never happens. A very high percentage of births go exactly as planned, or, at least, not far off plan. complications like mine are extremely unusual.
Finally we went up to the mom and baby ward and began the recovery process. Some ‘highlights’:
- the catheter… yeah… enough said.
- My amazing husband taking care of me and the baby (along with the nurses, of course). I thought he was amazing before, now I’m even more head-over-heels in love with him than before.
- first attempted trip to the bathroom (4 feet away) when I pretty much fainted dead away on the floor – thank God for my hubby holding me up!!
- Hubby sleeping so soundly that he couldn’t hear me calling for him, the baby crying, or feel the projectiles I was throwing at him hit him in the face..
- a totally relieving/refreshing sponge bath… from my mother-in-law. I have to say, having a nurse for a mother-in-law, especially MY mother-in-law, is amazing and such a blessing.
- Hubby McGyver-ing a way to wash my nasty, nasty hair in bed.
- Lots of lovely visits from friends and family
- ‘dropping’ 2 rather large blood clots – first one was 400ml, 2nd was 100ml
- Nearly passing out from trying to walk to the discharge meeting.
- The most amazing Nursing staff. Loved them all and had favorites; Rebecca, Stasia, Kelly, Lien, and Rose (and the nurse who helped deliver whose name I forgot in the craziness of our delivery…
- Getting in the car to go home.
- Bawling my eyes out because I wanted to be back in the hospital with our nurses… embarrassing? perhaps, but they were just that awesome.